Thursday, February 4, 2010

Bull by the horns

On Tuesday night I attended my first Over-eaters Anonymous(OA) meeting. Since we had a bunch of snow that night and people in Virginia don't travel once the flakes fly, there were only 4 people there so there was no chance to sit in the back of the room and just check it out, no sir, I was 25% of the group that night so I did my share of reading and sharing and get-to-know you stuff.
I suppose it is a good thing, people there know me and hope that I'll come back, I'm more accountable than if I'd been able to sit in the back of the room.
What impressed me most was how seriously everyone there took this thing. There weren't any jokes about pigging-out or self-deprecating remarks about waistlines or pants size. The people there introduced themselves by their first name and their problem and they spoke so seriously about the long hard look they'd had to take at themselves and how they had to continue to take that look everyday. They also talked a lot about how they have to surrender their addiction to God and relying on a higher power to master and control their compulsion.
I am now at about 36 hours of "abstinence" which means I haven't pigged out or deviated from my food plan since before my meeting which is a big deal for me as I live in my kitchen surrounded by food. I am constantly preparing various snacks and such for my two crazy people and I had to be very mindful and stop myself a couple of times from not falling into old habits like finishing off the Pudding's PB&J (she never eats the crusts) or snacking on a cookie or piece of bread while I was fixing lunch or diner.
As I finish this I've now finished my 2nd full day of abstinence and it's growing on me. Keep your fingers crossed.